Less than two months before Gov. Jim Gibbons delivers his State of the State address in Carson City, the Las Vegas Chamber of Commerce has lost the head of its already thin government affairs department. Christina Dugan is off to parts unknown and the chamber is advertising the organization's most important political position:

"Reporting to the President & CEO, the Vice President of Government Affairs develops and oversees the implementation of the Chamber's government affairs programs. The Vice President promotes the Chamber's policy positions and issues relevant to the business community at the local, state and federal levels. Coordinates the Government Affairs Committee-the volunteer committee charged with overseeing the Chamber's political program. Establishes the government affairs budget including political action committee fundraising development. Engages in extensive internal (Chamber board, staff and membership) and external (elected officials/public/media) written and verbal communications. Supervises the Chamber's on-site survey research facility used for both internal and external (revenue-generating) purposes. As a member of the President's Executive Team, actively supports other Chamber executives and initiatives and participates in Chamber events and functions."

For a group that advocates fiscal discipline and government transparency, could the ad be any more voluble and opaque? So what is this job really about?

Let me do what I do best — help out the chamberites. Here is what the job actually entails, what the qualifications actually are and what a truthful ad actually would say:

Wanted:

Someone who is willing to do all the things President Kara Kelley hates to do — justify policy positions, explain election endorsements and results and, of course, go to Carson City for four months and pretend to be having a good time while talking to the Gang of 63.

Someone practiced in the art of rhetorical gymnastics, whether it be explaining to thousands of small-business members why a gross receipts tax that exempted them was bad or explaining to them why a payroll tax that directly affects them is good or explaining to them how Campaign '06 was a success even though the most harmful business initiatives (minimum wage, no-smoking-anywhere) passed and the chamber seemed invisible.

Someone who can explain to a capricious and sometimes divided board why the chamber's closest allies are folks such as state Sen. Barbara Cegavske, who has no influence, and why erstwhile friends such as state Sen. Bob Beers, who was the organization's main man in '03, might be a little angry that he was snubbed in the gubernatorial sweepstakes after all he did for business.

Someone who realizes that despite the title of government affairs vice president, your input really doesn't mean much if lobbyist Sam McMullen has a different idea and that you really are there to glad-hand and spin the un-spinnable the best you can.

The good news is that not much can really go wrong in Session '07 because you endorsed the governor and Senate Majority Leader Bill Raggio is a Friend of the Chamber. And, really, how much damage can Speaker Barbara Buckley really do in the Assembly, right?

Yes, it's a dream job. Any takers?